Week 14 Rudy, Gump, Up, it’s my story .I’m no longer committed to.

The subject is the movie Rudy  made up his mind at an early age because of how he was treated by the kids on The Sandlot, he dreamed out loud he told people hes going to play for Notre Dame, they scoffed at him.Rudy,he yelled broadcasts that he had memorized of football games at Notre Dame .His high school coach told him Rudy I’m going to miss you. That coach saw his heart, his jesuit teacher didn’t.His dad told him,Dreamers are not doers , his dad practiced being convinced he had it good enough setting for no creativity, and convincing the rest of the family.Rudy saw the end results ,event though his priest at School would not let him go on the bus because he knew nothing of Rudy’s mission, again no idea of what was in his head. Just like me.How do we know each other unless we know each other’s intentions and help them live into it. PROVIDED ITS WORTH WHILE.Oh FUBAR what are we going to to do with disrupters. His best friend believed in him , got him a Notre Dame jacket a, structural reminder that he had a committed , going to Notre Dame.His ftiend took took him serious his friends said having dreams it’s the only thing that makes life tolerable, Rudy’s dream made his friends life tolerable which leaves the question. Why are we tolerating life. Rudy’s brother puts him down, but not Peter Peter ,Peter believe in his dream and reminded Rudy of it . At Peters funeral Rudy created a declaration I’m going to South Bend his dad in all his wisdom (haha )gave him permission to take two weeks off because of the loss of his friend Pete. Rudy is accused of chasing a stupid dream and his dad said Notre Dame is not for us Notre Dame its not for you. Your grandfather lost everything chasing his dream and in his embarrassment he left everyone.(that’s what I did  just changed people). Rudy was clear his future was not in the steel business, Rudy gets to South Bend , On the human level the priest is trying to figure out what Rudy is running away from ,what psychological pain is he trying to get away from, he tells Rudy just like his dad Notre Dame is not for everybody. My question is what price will I pay to have my dream fullfilled, how many people will i enroll in my dream? How do I picture myself on the field .Who understands ,what my dream is. Even the coach says you’re in the wrong place. Persistence in the face of no agreement, fortitude ,determination .Reinventing,my self. When you follow your passion you will work for nothing , you will work in faith, you will learn by your mistakes.He was told you gotta be nuts laughed at ,humiliated Rudy let it bounce off , andRudy and enrolled the groundskeeper in his commitment it’s clear he took his dream and went into action and opportunities or Miracles popped. It has me question have I done all I can ,have I prayed and meditated on it to bring Him in to my game. I WAS Surrounded by disappointment ,failure, businesses disappearing, marriage devorse depression, diabetes, sleep apnea, alcoholism,  a dieing sibling.  Rudy comes home proud to the family Christmas to  get-together he’s put down, Brother marries girlfriend. He is let down and he told everybody he would work harder. Rudy worked out , Rudy drilled himself Rudy put structual intensional behavior in his life, I have to believe I  did a hell of a job chasing my dream. I’m grateful I persevered ,for my health and my community. The priest didn’t even believe in him.My community let met down, I didn’t quite. My heart’s was in it, People with more talent, more support ,more education stronger community, are struggling, giving up, sick dieing early, drugs etc. Rudy gets creamed by a player and doesn’t quit he gets loyalties from coach Praceguan he gets loyaly from a black player, number 21 who believed in him. The player said he can have my jersey. Rudy never quit in the face of no agreement he said and gave himself quiet time to reconnect to his subconscious mind, tell the world what you want, tell Universe  (subbie ) what you want ,and it will show up. As The story goes Rudy’s friends stuck up for him and started reminding him of who he really is. I have nothing to prove to anyone except myself, Rudy did this also, he had to walk back on the field they knew he was missing. the captain of the football team told coach he can play in my jersy. Rudy’s dad is there  on game today standing in the Alcove he never thought he’d be there Rudie’s father had no vision for himself or his son. It’s game day they’re ready to run out on the field and the captain of the team. asks are you ready for this Rudy. Rudy replies I’ve been ready for this my whole life. The community buy now is believing in him, and proud to be a part of his life and his mission. So the lesson is suck it up restate your commitment put the structures in place around you to to have it come true. Enroll others with my accomplishments. Build with people who see in me ,what they want for themselves.

I am a consultant , who will coach clients, salesreps, installers, &new owners, why I’ve earned $3888.00 per week and how I’missed going to do it again.

F.B.I.  faith based innictive.

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week 12 ?week 13? “week 14

So here I am 100% responsible. Nah, the conversation in my head is” whats the use ???”

I am a yellow, A horse, A catalyst, I love acknowledgment, so knowing all that what is my DMP. I am a yellow Zepher flying over the abundant plains of the universe,a catalyst for opportunities that put $3888.00 dollars per week in my pocket, because I earn it.My business system will retire me with full pay,with a Villa on the island of Cuba. on or before 8/8/18 . my family and friends will dine with me for a weekly family meals. If Skype is necessary,so be it,the family will be there. I persist until i succeed.

I’m in Billings Mt.,every seven weeks,watching my children become parenting  grown ups & my grandchildren getting to know the wild colorful grandfather they have,called POP’s I persist until I succeed.

Look at that (I’m still Here) . In discovery and reflection of what i have posted, on several occasions, I reported that  I was out of integrity with my agreements. I firmly believed the thought police would close down my site, but No that never happened.Instead I was acknowledged for what i did write. I was touched  in a Godly perspective,encouragement and acknowledgment.There,s my love language giving me access to persist. I persist until I succeed.

In reflection of my childhood, I made my Parents ,aunts uncles all wrong. My lack of family life sent me out into the world looking for evidence to prove my point. I pretended I was happy while I was trying to figure out what life was all about.Fake it till I make, would be the title of adolescent DMP. or ( Dont Worry Be Happy ).By Bob Marlie .I wake up every day with an optimistic view , there’s lots of opportunity out there and soaring off I would go.i PERSIST UNTIL I SUCCEED.

REALIZATION ;no one responded, no one said OK Ben were shutting you out of the course .there i am still standing there observing Me , (Beatles ,Title song “All through the days ,I me mine ,I me mine ,I me.mine.) I PERSIST UNTIL I SUCCEED.

WEEK 14 SATURDAY         School as i look back at now was I one of the lab rats. Was I constantly being observed and recorded because  they knew I was not learning the way they taught. “No child left behind.” Did I get “C”s for a grade because they could SEE me.Was I a case study for ADD ,OR HAAD . I PERSIST UNTIL I SUCCEED.

Acts of service. with out agreement in place ,leads to anger and unmet expectations. I wanted my dream or hearts desire to be fulfilled.If I work hard they will take care of me.Nope that didn’t work either. I PERSIST UNTILL I SUCCEED.

THANK YOU FATHER  FOR THE ABUNDANCE i GET TO SORE OVER. I persist until i succeed.

 

week 11

misspeak, and i hurt some one. missthink and i hurt me.

it was 10 pm yesterday evening, layed down ,5 hrs later im up.the pain and empty ness is still there . what the use .life what a test. i learned to forgive my self ,granting being to myself became my way. projecting Im always in a good mood.

Yes its a H.A.L.T. moment H=hungry,A=angery,T=tired,L=lonely,T=tired..

M.U.L.E= man under load expired.

My nose has that i want to cry tingle.

eyes watering

Im sorry i love you please forgive me thank you

Should i stay or should i go.

Its like the tides or warm to cold.

week 10

starting to wake up ,said a better way ,becoming more aware. My one sentence DMP is .

What i have is a clear view of the director of operations of the universe,in my life, knowing Him  in all seven areas of my life , lights me up, to live in His connected design.

I am present to my mind use choices ie HABIT discipline is some thing like this.

You are what eat.

You are what you think.

How do i train my thought language usage ,to give excess to the mind (subbie) input directives.

Healthy input ,clear stated results ,shared with others causing there minds to be present to the outcome that benefits all of us.

my seven areas of life are God -,Health -,Family-, job (own it don’t let it own me ) -service to community – education  – recreation.

B-jamin  w U  .. later

Week 9

I am in a breakdown ,both phones are malfunctioning, it’s been 10 days ,still no phone.

If that’s not enough,to throw me off, I’ve been blessed with incredible amount of work that are money maker’s ,like bank, like stacking cash. One job me and the team changed the design and the client sends an email that raves about the fence,and he points out that she says nothing about the landscaping or the patio with the burn pit or the timing Nothing. zippo Nada. But the fence was beyond her expectations, extraordinary.

Week 10

I really love what’s going on and I want to see how it’s going to affect all 7 areas of my life.

I am really struggling with this I have no Freedom peace and ease.

On the other hand I ad a breakthrough in delegating, I published my formula for success and sent it to the people in my organization AND told them in writing I’m earning $3888.00 per week by 8/8/18.I’m worth it and I’ll show them how they can grow the company and be part of a pay plan that makes every qualified individual a partner in profit sharing.

I,m standing for work-ability, integrity, and Its being recorded in a company manual. I’m starting to realize my dream of owning a business that is sell-able and reproducible.

Writing is very therapeutic ,writing is my legacy .